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Posted in Uncategorized

A heartwarming story about Neverending Nightmares

Firstly, my apologies for not updating the blog. I upload the videos to youtube, mention them on hootsuite, on the forums, and the kickstarter updates, so I usually run out of steam to repost them here. Posting text here would probably make more sense anyway, but I usually do the videos instead of writing because I obsess over every word when I write.

Okay, down to business! As you may know, Neverending Nightmares has many goals besides to just scare the pants off of people. Expressing the feelings of mental illness is important to me because:

  1. I’d like to promote a greater understanding of mental illness, which will hopefully remove some of the stigma associated with it.
  2. I’d like to reach out to those who are currently suffering and show them they are not alone because I think there are a lot of commonalities between my experience and everyone who has mental illness.

I would agree that those are some very ambitious plans, and it may be hard to succeed. #1 is particularly hard to judge the success, but I think by people talking about mental illness and getting in articles like this one on Paste Magazine, I feel I am succeeding.

I would say I am doing a pretty good job at #2. Every so often I get an email or someone comes up to me at an event and mentions how they felt the game really captured how they feel in their own personal struggles with mental illness. I recently got an email from someone that really warmed my heart. I wanted to share it with you all: (with the author’s permission of course)

Im not sure if this is the email you check or if somebody else checks this but mr. Gilgenbach, I would just like to say thank you for creating the game Neverending nightmares. I suffer from obsessive compulsive disorder and one day while on youtube I stumbled upon piewdie pie playing this game. I did further research and found out that you also did retro/grade which I thought was an interesting game, I also learned of your battle with ocd and depression which I currently suffer from and I honestly felt like I had found a kindred spirit. Mr. Gilgenbach I was so amazed by how well you captured how I felt with ocd that it almost scared me how similar it felt when watching the main character in the game. For a while I struggled with explaining to people just what I was feeling and then this game comes along and I am just thankful for doing something like this. I have been looking for something that I could hold onto, something that I could relate to and now im not as scared and now im not as sad. Thank you very much.

Remember that if you suffer from mental illness, you aren’t alone! A lot have people have, and things get can get better! I recommend seeking professional help. It is challenging telling your deepest most fears to a complete stranger, and the treatments can be tough for a variety of reasons. However, it can make a huge difference in the quality of your life, so it is worth it – at least it was for me. I’d like to wish the author of this email luck in his struggle fighting OCD and thank him for letting me share his story!

Posted in Neverending Nightmares

145 – DreadOut

The Indonesian horror game DreadOut (act 1) came out recently, so I recorded a video talking about what worked and what didn’t.

Posted in Developer Diary, Horror Games

144 – Among The Sleep

In this video, I give my thoughts on the recently released horror game, Among the Sleep.

Posted in Developer Diary, Horror Games

143 – Presence

In this diary I talk about what developers can do to create a feeling of presence – that you are in the game – beyond just VR. I also talk about how much I’d love Neverending Nightmares to have smell-o-vision (even though I don’t think technology exists).

Posted in Developer Diary, Neverending Nightmares

142 – Ethics Of Kickstarter

In response to Steve Swink’s excellent GDC talk on the ethics of running a kickstarter I give my own thoughts on the ethics.

Posted in Dev Advice, Developer Diary

141 – Kinect

In this dev diary, I talk about the Xbox One’s Kinect, its potential, and why it might make sense to make it optional.

Posted in Developer Diary

140 – Game Length, Quality, and Value

In this video, I discuss what game length means to different people, the value of entertainment, and the quality of experience.

Posted in Developer Diary

139 – Octodad and Horror Design

I enjoyed Octodad, but while playing it, I realized that Octodad has similar problems to horror games in terms of potentially frustrating gameplay in order to create other emotions (humor or horror). If you didn’t think it was possible to watch someone talk for over 10 minutes comparing Octodad to a horror game, this video will prove you wrong!

Posted in Developer Diary

138 – Tension

In this video, I discuss the importance of tension and how we try to use it in Neverending Nightmares.

Posted in Developer Diary, Neverending Nightmares